Imaginary
by peace1089
Summary: What would you do if your best friend was imaginary?
1. Chapter 1

The only sound was my own intake and exhale of the stale winter air. I was focus on the project in front of me, not

the 'magical' falling of ice crystals. It was just rain, except frozen. Bright colours splashed across the watercolour paper.

Red, neon green, blue, little details all made there way onto the page. Every once and a while I glanced upwards at my

subject. He fidgeted and sighed, impatient for the moment he could-  
"Alright, I'm done. You can move now." A loud sigh of relief escaped him.  
"Thank god." I peeled the tape off of the edges of the paper that held it down to the forever stained desk. "Can I see it?" I

pulled a calligraphy pen out of my back pocket and signed it quickly.  
"Sure." I showed him the imperfect painting. He examined it, his eyes skating and digging and analyzing the work.  
"So this is what I look like?"  
"Yeah. More or less. It's impossible to get that shade of red on paper with watercolour paints. And I didn't quite get the

angles of the right side of your face right either. Almost, but not quite."

"If you don't like it, I can try to re-paint it better."  
"I... I'm sexy." I scoffed, a smirk slowly spreading across my face.  
"Of course you would think that. You already thought you were."  
"Yeah, but now I'm certain!" A grin was slapped on his face from ear to ear. "Any woman would love me!"  
"If women could see you..."  
"Touche, my friend." He 'patted' me on the shoulder. The smile slowly faded as silence ensued. He stopped looking at the portrait and at me instead. "20 questions."  
"Really?"  
"Really."

"What is one thing I probably don't know about you?"  
"Question number uno. I hate my 'artwork.'"  
"You shouldn't, you're too talented to hate on yourself. Okay... shit. I can't think of one... Has there ever been anyone you

liked and didn't tell me?"  
"Question two. Of course not. You've been right next to me since day one. How could I not have accidentally told you?"  
"True. Umm... I can probably guess, but who is your 'favorite' person here?"  
"Question three. Stupid. You."  
"I meant besides me!" He let out an exasperated noise.  
"Question four. Uh... I guess Aerith. She's nice enough."  
"That shouldn't count as another question."  
"It does."  
"Up yours."

"Hmm... How long do you think I'll be around...?"

"..."  
"...Question five. I'm already sixteen. I don't think you'll be leaving any time soon if you didn't after all this time."  
"...People will start thinking you're crazy."  
"Cause it looks like I'm talking to myself? Psh, whatever. They can suck it."  
"I can't think of any more questions."  
"Okay, then it's my turn. And I get all of the questions you didn't use." He wasn't pleased, but switched spots with me on my

bed anyway. I now sat atop my lifeless, flat pillows and gathered the shabby quilt on top of my lap. I was finally starting

to feel the cold.  
"Question one. What is your name?"  
"I don't know."  
"Question two. How old are you?"  
"... At least eighteen."  
"Question three. Why are you here?"  
"Okay, I guess if you don't want me here I can try to leave... But no, seriously, I don't even know."  
"Question four. Who are your parents?"  
"I don't know, just like you don't know yours."  
"Question five. When did you get your lip pierced?"  
"My lip is pierced?" I snorted.  
"Question six. Have you ever crushed on someone even though you know you can't really meet them?"  
"No."  
"Question seven. Do you think you ever will?"  
"No. I'm not quite that stupid."  
"Question eight. So does that mean you don't think you'll ever love?"  
"No."  
"Question nine. Do you have favorite music?"  
"Yes. Your favorite music, seeing as that's all you really listen to."  
"True. Question ten. Do you ever sleep?"  
"... Sort of. I don't ever feel tired, but at some point during the night I black out for a couple of hours and end up somewhere different, but always within twenty feet of you..."  
"Question eleven. Why do you think that is?"  
"I have no idea. Stop asking the same question in a different form and expect me not to notice."  
"Question twelve. What question do you think I keep asking?"  
"Why I'm here."

"Is that all of your questions?"  
"Yeah. I'm getting tired." I stretched, popping my back repeatedly.  
"Night."  
"Night... Axel." 


	2. Chapter 2

When I woke, He was sitting at the foot of my bed, legs crossed, as per usual. He had a thoughtful look on his face. "About time you woke up, Aerith's been trying to get you up for ten minutes now. It's already 8:10." I leaped out of bed and threw my uniform on.  
"And YOU didn't wake me up why?"  
"I figured you needed the sleep."  
"It's not like I can sleep through school." I spritzed a little water on my hair and tried to mold it back into place (it never ever stays in place despite the trouble I go through to try to make it that way), brushing my teeth at the same time.  
"Your shoes are over here."  
"dhanks."  
"I don't understand gibberish, monkey boy." He smirked, sitting back down on my bed, playing with his lip ring with his tongue. I spat my toothpaste out into the sink.  
"I said thanks, asshole."  
"You're welcome."  
"Roxas? Are you awake now, sweety?" Aerith's voice was strong but quiet through the door.  
"Yes, ma'am."  
"Good. I have poptarts for you so you don't get hungry. I put them in your backpack downstairs."  
"Thank you, ma'am." He was quietly chuckling at how polite I sounded compared when I spoke to him. I tied my tie and found my shoes right where he said they were and glared when he laughed at my struggle with my jacket (there is a rather long backstory to why I go to a private school rather than public, but that is a different story and I'll leave it at I am a rich orphan). After what seemed like ages, I ran out my bedroom door and down the stairs, grabbing my backpack on my way out the front door to the van.  
"Hurry up, Roxas!"  
"I don't wanna be late cause you're a lazy bum!" When I finally buckled my seat belt and slid the van door shut, the prostests stopped and He sat in the space between the row of seats I was in and the next. He looked at the girl who was being the loudest and rolled his eyes.  
"Stupid bitch. Still wearing pigtails like you're five. Grow up." He pretended to grab her pigtail and pull.  
"Ouch! Who did that!" I stared wide-eyed at him and He back at me. He'd never been able to grasp anything before. We all said "Not me," and she scoffed, turning away from us in her seat.  
"Wow, Kairi, getting a little dramatic there? Not one of us touched your damn nasty hair," Sora said. He looked like he was gonna give Sora a high-five if he could. Instead, he tried messing with her again. He grabbed both of her pigtails and pulled hard.  
"Damnit, if you guys don't stop messing with me, I'll hurt you," she threatened, rubbing her abused hair.  
"Bitch, we're not doing shit to you," Riku spoke up. She scowled.  
"Grow up, assholes." Sora and Riku started muttering to each other about how much of a drama queen bitch she was, leaving me to my silence with him. I raised a single eyebrow at him, as to say, "Really?"  
"Yup."  
"Hey, did you say something?" Sora looked at me quizically. "No..."  
"Alright, sorry. Kairi's hallucinations must be contagious." He grinned as she scoffed. I gave Him a look that said "Holy shit."

At school, I sat in the deserted boy's bathroom and talked to Him.  
"How is that possible?"  
"I don't know! I know as much as you do! All I know is everything you know!" I tried to think this through, figure out what had changed to make the change and all I could come up with was his name.  
"I have a name?"  
"Yeah."  
"And you didn't tell me?"  
"I didn't really have a chance to." His rising anger suddenly died and ended with a sigh.  
"So it's new?" He slumped a little.  
"Yes, but it's real."

"Axel." His eyebrows raised.  
"Strange name for a stranger 'person.'" He put airquotes around 'person,' sighing again.  
"Hey, you are a person, imagination of mine or not." We became quiet when a group of guys came roughhousing in the bathroom.  
"I totally got to bang her and she thinks that we're together now because of it!"  
"Haha! Doesn't beat my story!" I froze, as well as Axel. "I finally got to fuck this virgin girl who's been claiming she's all about chastity and 'no sex before marriage' and all that bullshit and now she's denying it to EVERYONE. She's a fucking hypocrite and I want to laugh in her face cause she can't even look at me without blushing and denying anything I say, even when I just say she looks nice today." All the guys laughed.  
"You have the best luck with the ladies, don't you Axel?" I swear my heart stopped beating for a second cause next thing I knew I was staring at the ceiling. MY Axel was looking down at me worriedly.

"You okay, kid? You look like you saw a ghost." Not... I looked around furiously, searching for him, but to no avail.  
"Yeah... What happened?" I decided to play it cool. "I came in here cause I wasn't feeling too well..."  
"You should probably go to the nurse's office." I examined him as thoroughly as two seconds would allow. Same laugh lines, same lip piercing, same hair... same eyes.

I nodded, getting back on my feet. I left quickly, trying not to throw up. Axel- really my Axel this time- reappeared next to me.  
"What the fuck just happened?" I asked him in a low voice.  
"You just passed out all of a sudden. You would have cracked your head open but I guess I was corporeal enough to break your fall. The guy heard you fall and came in as soon as I unlocked the door. For a moment I thought he could see me, cause it seemed like he was looking at me, but his eyes turned to you. You look really, really sick."  
"Ugh. I feel sick too. Do you realize he looks...?"  
"Like me? And has my name? Cause I was wondering about that."  
"It's like you guys are the same person... The resemblance... well, no, there isn't a resemblance because you were exactly the same. If I hadn't realized that he was tangible I would have started talking to him like I would you."

We walked in silence the rest of the way to the nurses office. 


	3. Meditation

"Annnnd... There!" The black haired nurse beamed at me with excess enthusiasm, patting my hair before she got up to put away the thermometer. "You don't have a fever, so I can't let you go home. Sorry. But you can lay down on one of the cots for a while if you want to. They're in the back room," she said, pointing at a door.  
"Thank you," I mumbled, shuffling into the room lined with beds. Axel (my Axel, not... the other one) followed me, looking almost as distressed as me. I closed the door behind us and sat down. "Have you ever tried meditating?"  
"Who, me?" Axel asked.  
"No, the other imaginary person in my head."  
"No, why would I do that?"  
"I dunno, maybe it would help you figure out something about yourself... and considering how we just met you... we might want to try. Plus, meditation is supposed to help 'calm the mind' or whatever."  
I move to sit on the floor and Axel follows, both of us crossing our legs and putting our hands palm up on our laps. Axel places his right hand above mine and there's a difference. I can... almost feel a warmth radiating from where his hand should be. I try to relax, shutting my eyes and thinking about looking inside myself. I breathe deeply.

...

"Axel!" I trip over exposed roots, pushing past trees, whipping wet leaves out of my face. I don't feel the harsh whip of the cold, sharp drops of rain as they soak me to the bone. I'm unsure if it's adrenaline that keeps the pain at bay or something else... I reach a clearing and nearly fall to my knees. I'm... too late. He lay on the ground, covered in blood, the victorious fighter looting his bag. I growl, beyond angry, beyond upset, beyond all hope of control. Next thing I know, I have him pinned against the cliff with one of my blades, the other about to go through his neck. I know this is wrong but... as he falls to the ground like a rag doll... I knew I couldn't stop. I turn away from the assassin's limp corpse and to... Axel.  
I breathe a sharp intake of breath. He lay still on the ground, red hair half coated in ugly brown mud. As soon as I saw him up close... I knew he was already gone. I fell to my knees and screamed.  
"Namine! Why must you destroy everything I love? I thought we had a deal!"  
"We did." The soft spoken girl appeared out of nowhere. "And he will be yours. Someday. But he couldn't be in this life." I growled, spinning towards her. I dropped my blades, instead, holding her up by the front of her shirt.  
"So you had to kill him?! This isn't what I wanted!" Her azure eyes remained calm.  
"Are you deaf? I said, when you are reborn, you will find him. He will finally be yours. Isn't that what you wanted? You just have to hope you're reborn in the same era... or else it might take two generations or even three." I lowered her, knowing I could say nothing now to bring him back.  
"What are you saying?"  
"Kill yourself. Then there's no way you'll be born in separate eras." She plucked a strange red flower from the earth and held it out to me. "Eat this. I will put the same type of flower in Axel's heart. Lay next to him. Then kill yourself. I will cast a spell on your bodies so you will know each other in your next life, for I may not be there." I grabbed the flower from her and lay next to him. I swallowed the flower and drank my poison. Anything for you.

...

I gasped for air, my eyes flashing open. I looked at Axel, still lost in his meditation, and blushed. There was no mistaking the meaning. Axel... I was in love with you?


	4. Definire

***Elsewhere in school, the "new" Axel's POV

"Hey... Did you see that?" I stared at the blond phantom, wide-eyed and shaking.  
"What, the girl you screwed? She's fucking ugly," he deadpanned, deep blue eyes boring into me.  
"No! The... the guy who looks exactly like you!" He rolled his eyes.  
"Yes, of course. I have eyes. Better than yours, apparently."  
I tried to stand from the bathroom floor, finding it difficult to stand on my wobbly legs.

*Five minutes ago*  
I had told my "friends" to go to class when the bell rang, just a moment after I heard the kid hit the ground. I found him, slightly raised from the ground by an unseen force, and unconscious. I nearly passed out myself, but managed to collect myself (mostly) by the time he came to. He looked at me as if he recogized, then shocked when I said  
"You okay kid? You look like you just saw a ghost." I hoped he didn't hear the slight waver in my voice. He glanced around quickly.  
"Yeah... What happened?" he sounded weak. "I came in here cause I wasn't feeling too well..."  
"You should probably go to the nurse's office," I stated, drinking in his eyes- so familiar to me, but he was a stranger to me. He analyzed me, I could see his eyes leave mine and to my face, my hair, then back to my eyes. After a moment, he nodded quickly, getting to his feet, and practically ran out of the bathroom. I sighed and stayed where I was. I ran a hand through my hair and realized- I forgot to ask what his name was.

***

"What do you mean, better than mine?" I clutched the sink, pulling myself up onto shaky knees. I very near glared at him.  
"I mean, there was another phantom." I fell down again, feeling weak and a cold sweat had broken out across my whole body.  
"Another... But.. that's impossible! We've never seen another phantom like you, why would we suddenly find one?" He shrugged so nonchalantly, so unlike his flesh twin... the one I'd just seen.  
"I'm going home. Fuck school."  
"Not like you cared before," he replied, following me out of the bathroom- slowly because I was still unstable on my lanky legs. We said nothing until we got to my car in the senior's parking lot.  
"What... what do you think this means?" I asked, as if he would know something I didn't. He shook his head slowly.  
"Like I would know..." I sighed, started up my car, and sped all the way home. No, home is too cozy... more like, a house, the place where I rest and eat and shit. Nothing more, nothing less.  
When I got there, it was empty, as expected. I hiked it up the stairs to my bedroom, and laid down. The blond sat down at the end of my bed.  
"Too much for 'cool guy Axel' to handle?" he asked sardonically. I glared at him, wishing for one second that I could actually touch him and then... I would slap the shit outta him.  
"Y'know, you really know how to piss me off sometimes, Roxas."  
I passed out immediatly.  
And woke up in a dream, no, a nightmare.

I groaned, sitting up in the mud. It was if I'd fallen asleep here, but something was off. Roxas laid next to me, his blond hair streaked with mud.  
"Hey Roxas, wake up. What happened last night? I remember getting into a fig-" I abruptly stopped when I realized he hadn't stirred, hadn't moved an inch. I touched his arm, fearing the worst. He was as cold as ice. My eyes widened, and I flipped him onto his back.  
"Roxas!" A trail of blood had dried across his face, one that had started from his slightly smirking lips. His eyes were open, but missing life. I tried to take his pulse. Nothing. I tried to beat a beat back into his heart, all to no avail. "No!" I shouted. "This can't be happening!" I furiously looked around, looking for the witch. "Namine, you bitch! What did you do to Roxas?" I screamed, my voice cracking from its intensity. She stepped from behind a tree, her long, white dress unstained by the mud. I got up, my blood boiling, and held her up off her feet by her dress. She just giggled as innocently as a child.  
"I didn't do anything. **HE** thought you were dead, and I offered him a way to see you again," she murmured, smirking malevolently.  
"Give me one good reason I shouldn't snap your fucking neck," I hissed, my teeth clenched.  
"Because then he won't see you again. You'll have no idea how to get to him, no way to do it, even if you knew how." I wanted to cry.  
"How do I...?"  
"You have to die." I felt my stomach knot up a little.  
"Is that all?" I laugh sarcastically.  
"No, you must die the same way as Roxas- with a flower and a poison. Then I will cast a spell on your bodies so you will find each other." Tears started falling from my eyes.  
"Do you know why... why he did this?" I set her down, glaring at her.  
"Because he loved..." (My dream became blurry, I couldn't hear her next words, but I saw myself, as if through a sheet of frosted glass, lying down next to the blond, dying. I was gone, but Namine was not. The blurriness faded abruptly.) She smiled sadly at the two teens, as she put Roxas' hand on what had been mine.  
_"Quamvis animas vestras abire hodie, vos mos reperio invicem, alia die ... Invenies in animo, alia felicitas. In fide et virtute foris Sic enim solum concurrant. Amor alligabo animis vestris, vestri imaginationis cordibus definire,"_ she whispered. Wish I knew what that meant... A spark of red light covered the boys, originating from her hands. I tried to move, have some corporeal body, but I couldn't, I didn't. Somehow she saw me, however, and tutted at me. "You're not supposed to be here, silly Axel. Always impatient. You should wake up now, and find him. You know which 'him' I am speaking of, I trust." She smiled before everything went black.  
**


	5. Sketching

** back to Roxas's POV

I sat, thunderstruck, staring at Axel until he opened his eyes, then quickly looked away.  
"Remember anything?" I whispered. He "pshhh-ed" at me to say "as if."  
"Wish I could, but I got nothing." I looked at his piercing green eyes and hoped he couldn't tell a difference in mine. I'm almost certain all of the confusion and the new way I examined him was apparent, but by the way he continued, I was surprised to find he hadn't noticed a thing.  
"What about you?" I didn't trust my voice, so I simply shook my head.  
"Unfortunately, no. Maybe meditation really is a bunch of bullshit," I mumbled after a moment. He grinned at me and gestured for me to stand up.  
"I think it's time you get to class." I glanced at the clock behind him and nearly swore. I had spent all but the last class of the day in here. Thankfully it wasn't a class that required acadamic attention. It was art class.  
"Yeah, let's get the hell outta here."

We hurried to my class after getting a pass from the nurse, and settled in quickly to our table. As I sketched out a scene, trying not to pay attention to whatever it was I was drawing, I locked the meditation in the back part of my head that Axel didn't know about. I allowed him to speak in the forefront of my mind, so I didn't have to talk aloud and look like a complete crazy.  
"You okay?" he asked.  
"Yeah, just... on edge, wondering what is going on here, and confused," I replied.  
"Understandable. You just met someone who looks like the imaginary person inside your head."  
"Don't say that," I snapped. "You're more than that, you and I both know it." He was slightly taken aback, and said nothing for a while, just watched what I drew. I just let my hand go free, doing whatever it wanted to, and let my mind drift. It wasn't until Axel 'said' something that I realized what I was drawing.  
"What... no, who... is that?" I startled, taking my hand away from the paper. I bit my lip, staring at the sketch- of Axel- but dressed like someone you'd see in Sweeney Todd.  
"Whoa, Roxas, that's so cool!" a cheery voice behind me chimed. "I thought your specialty was painting, but that's badass!" I turned in my chair slightly to look at the blond. He had a huge, childlike grin spread across his face and his enthusiasm was almost corporeal.  
"Thanks, Demyx," I replied with a grin. He took it as a welcome to look closer and bent over to examine the rough portrait.  
"You know Axel?" My face drained of blood and I went cold.  
"Axel? No, I don't know any Axel, why?" I lied through my teeth. He smiled again.  
"Oh, just cause this guy looks a lot like him. I think you should meet him sometime, I think you two would be good friends." I managed, with great difficulty, not to bust up laughing. I was already his friend! He was sitting right next to me, but you can't see him! Oh, the irony of it all just made it hilarious.  
"I've heard some pretty nasty rumours about his womanizing," I replied. Demyx shrugged.  
"Yeah, but he never even dates the girls he screws. He doesn't seem to genuinely like any girl. I suppose that makes it worse, but hey, he's a cool guy once ya get to know him." Demyx grinned. "Axel and I are gonna go to Harlequin's tonight to see a band. Ya wanna come with us?" I hesitated momentarily, wondering if the redhead would remember me, but the chances of that were slim. Besides... I kinda wanted to know him.  
"Sure," I said, smiling back at the cheery blond. "I'd love to. What time? And where should I meet you guys?"  
"Eight, and we'll pick you up. You live on the corner of Cherry and Blakely, right?" I nodded. "I'm not a stalker, by the way, I'm friends with Sora," he sputtered, blushing a little. I nodded again.  
"Yeah, I know. Sora loves telling all his adventures with the infamous Demyx at the dinner table." He laughed.  
"Alrighty then, nine it is!" He sauntered away from our table.  
'What do ya think about that?' I silently asked. Axel seemed a little... on edge.  
'Honestly,' he began, 'I'm just a little worried. I'm following you, but be careful, okay?'  
'Yeah, yeah, mother hen. Don't worry, I'll be careful," I smiled. I felt the urge to tousel his hair, but I knew that I couldn't, so I made my hands busy with inking the sketch. When the bell rang, I put away the sketch and practically danced out of class. I was definitely glad class was over- and excited for tonight.


	6. Meeting

***("new")Axel's POV

My eyes snapped open. I sat up, staring at the blond on the papasan in the corner of my room.  
"What time is it?" I asked.  
"Six fifty. Demyx called while you were asleep." I swiped my cell off my black nightstand and dialed Demyx's number.  
"Hello?"  
"Hey, Dem. Sorry, I fell asleep. What's up?"  
"Oh, hey, y'know how we're going to see "Firing at Nine Decibels" tonight? Well... I sorta invited a tag-along." Before I could say

anything, he rushed on.  
"He's really cool though, and he draws really well and I thought you guys would get along He's in my art class and he was drawing a

really cool picture today that sorta looked like you from the 1700's or something.  
He doesn't know you are though, just the rumours, so I thought-"  
"Dem, Dem, it's fine! Chill. What time do we pick him up? Where?" I heard an audible sigh of relief from the other end of the line.  
"Eight. He lives at the corner of Cherry and Blakely. I'll show you the way when I get over to your house."  
"Okay, see you then." I inwardly swore. Most guys would consider an hour plenty of time to get ready, but for me, that was just

enough to look presentable.  
"See you." I hit the end button and looked over at Roxas again.  
"Everytime I'm done talking to him it feels like I only heard a third of what he said." He chuckled at me, but gestured to my closet

as if to say, 'You gonna get ready or not?'

By the time I was done picking out my clothes, fixing my hair, rimming my eyes with charcoal liner, and thrusting my feet

into a pair of Converse, it was already seven thirty. I heard a knock at the front door and scrambled to get my car keys. I pulled

the door open, grinning at Demyx.  
"Ready to go?" he asked. I nodded, locking the door behind my phantom and me.  
"Ready as I'll ever be."

*****Roxas' POV  
School let out at 3:45 and I got home by 4, so I had four hours to get ready. Plenty of time, right? Wrong. Not when you've

never been to a concert and have no idea what to wear. I tossed my entire closet on my bed before Axel helped me pick out a decent

outfit that consisted of black skinny jeans, a plain carmine tee under a black vest, and black and white checkered Vans, along with

my customary white and black studded bracelet.  
"Ready," I stated, glancing at the clock. "Wow. It's already 7:30." Axel laid across the mound of clothes that were still on my bed

and nodded. He seemed a little out of it. He closed his eyes. I didn't think too much of it though and ran downstairs, grabbed a pack

of poptarts, and stuffed one in my mouth before I ran back up the stairs. When I got to my room, the first thing I noticed was Axel's

sudden change of apparel. Then, I noticed that he was trying to pick things up.  
"Axel?" He dropped his hands along with the struggling hairbrush. He almost got it off the table, but not quite. He looked at me

mournfully.  
"Roxas... I..." I gestured for him to sit with me on my bed.  
"Go on," I said as he sat, adding just a little weight to my bed. He struggled with his words, clenching and unclenching his fists.

He avoided my eyes for a moment, then directly looked at me with a fire burning in his acid green eyes that I hadn't seen before. He

moved his right hand to the side of my face, making my heartbeat jump a little.  
"I... want to be able to touch you... I want to be able to pick things up. I want to be a person, Roxas." I felt his hand ghosting

across my face, felt his thumb run over my lips and my cheekbone. I felt sorry for him.  
"I know... And I'm sorry. If I knew a way for you to be, I'd do it in an instant." I felt hollow to my core, despite the pop-tarts

rolling in my stomach uneasily. He put his left hand on my cheek, looking nearly broken hearted. I could feel the sadness rolling off

him in waves. I put my hands over his and sighed. I closed my eyes, unable to look in those unhappy eyes of his any longer. Then I

heard a knock at the door.  
"Roxas? Your friends are here," Aerith said through the door.  
"Coming," I replied. I took Axel's hands in mine and ghosted my lips over them. He shivered and pulled away.  
"C'mon," he began. "We don't want to keep your friends waiting." He tried to smile, and I offered a grin back.  
"Yeah, can't give them the excuse of my best friend holding me up because he didn't have his hair perfect." He chuckled, following me

out the door.

******("new") Axel's POV

While Demyx ran up to the door, I let my car idle and lit a cigarette. Today was more than a little stressful.  
"You know those aren't good for you," Roxas chimed from the back seat.  
"I don't care," I murmured back at the phantom.  
"You will when you're sixty and hacking up a lung." I rolled my eyes and rested my head on the headrest.  
"Axel~ I'd like you to meet my friend, Roxas." My eyes snapped open and I nearly dropped my cigarette. I whipped my head around to

see... Roxas... In the flesh.

******Back to normal Roxas POV :)

I met Demyx at the door downstairs, Axel in tow, and beamed up at him.  
"I'm so excited for you to meet my friend! He's been my best friend for ever and I think you guys will get along swimmingly!" He gave

me a huge grin and led us out the door. Parked in the driveway was a cherry red Camaro with smoke coming out the driver's window.  
"Does he smoke?" I asked, eyebrows knitting.  
"Yeah," Demyx allowed. "Usually only when he's stressed out, though." We picked our way down the cobblestone sidewalk quickly, and

before I could get a good look at the driver, Axel stiffened beside me and Demyx introduced me.  
"Axel, I'd like you to meet my friend, Roxas." I swallowed hard. No way was this happening... "I think you'll be the best of

friends!" The other mans head swiveled around quickly and met my frightened eyes. Dear baby Jesus... The redhead managed a small

smile and said,  
"I met you this morning. Did the nurse send you home?"  
"No," I squeaked. "She just had me lay on a cot all day." He nodded, looking rather nervous. Axel hadn't moved an inch beside me or

breathed since I started speaking to his flesh-twin. I snuck a quick peak at him and he looked rather pale, but more solid.  
"Let's get going, shall we?"  
"I call shotgun!" Demyx enthused.  
I climbed in the back seat and Axel sat in the middle. He looked terrified as he stared at the left most seat.  
_'Roxas!'_ he hissed in my mind.  
'What?'  
_'I... I don't think I'm imagining this... there's someone sitting in this seat... that looks exactly like you.' His 'voice' wavered, _obviously very shaken up. I felt a cold sweat coming on, but when I looked next to him, I couldn't see a thing. Still, I didn't just chalk it down to nerves. _'I'm... gonna try to talk to it...'_  
I made small talk with Demyx and 'Axel' while he attempted communication.  
_'Roxas! Something freaky is going on here!'_  
_'What? What's wrong?'_  
_'Not only does he speak, but he says he has the same name, and even creepier, he's with the guy that looks like me!'_ He seemed at his wit's end.  
Suddenly, 'Axel' parked the car and I realized we were at the venue.  
"Demyx, could you get in line for us? I wanna talk to... your friend for a second." I started quaking in my proverbial boots and climbed out of the car.  
"Sure!" Demyx sensed nothing wrong with the redhead's tight, nervous voice, and bounded over to the growing line.  
Several seconds of tense silence passed before the redhead said anything.  
"What the actual fuck?" I nearly laughed (hysterically).  
"Umm... care to elaborate?" He stared into my eyes.  
"Cut the bullshit, kid. Roxas is telling me that there's another phantom next to you." That threw me for a loop.  
"A phantom?" I thought about it for a few seconds. "Oh. You mean Axel. I suppose that's a better explanation than schizophrenia." He nearly glared. "He told me about the other 'person' first."  
"So what the hell is going on?" he persisted. "Cause all I got right now is a coincidence that's too 'coincidental' and a hell of a lot of confusion."  
"How am I supposed to know?" I glanced over at Axel, who looked just as nervous as me- and a little angry.  
"He may look like me, but he is nothing like me," he spat.  
"I agree."  
"What?" I looked back at Axel's flesh-twin and realized I said that out loud.  
"Oh, I was just agreeing with him that you are nothing alike." 'Axel' sighed, lit another cigarette, and paced.  
"Okay. Fine. But... how ae we going to sort this out?" I shrugged. Axel stepped forward, a little closer to the agitated redhead.  
"That's... a pretty good idea," he mumbled, taking two more steps before I could ask what he was doing. He stretched his hand out, and suddenly, a burst of light washed over him. The light split into two directions, one over his, and the other... over another figure that was rapidly becoming visible to me. 'Axel' and I gasped. The figure... looked exactly like me, all the way down to the shoes. The only difference was his dull, uncaring eyes. By the look on 'Axel's' face, I could tell he could see my Axel.

Well. I think this just got interesting.


	7. Cowards' Despair

Chapter 7- Cowards' Despair  
Roxas' POV

And like the coward I am, I run. I run and run, shaking and quivering and confused and about to throw up. I ran past the bar, I ran past all the buildings, and I ran until I couldn't stand, which was all the way home. I ran 20 miles on pure fear and adrenaline. I sat on the porch for several minutes, trying (and failing) to catch my breath. Nothing made sense. Nothing at all. Aerith finally came to the porch and said nothing as she helped me to my feet and steered my shuffling feet up the stairs, into my bedroom, and into bed. She took off my shoes, pulled the covers up to my chin, and kissed my forehead. She said nothing as she switched out the light and shut the door.

Axel's POV

...What the fuck? I stared after the blond as he ran, then turned back to the scene. Except it was gone. Both... of those things. I felt a tug in my heart, ignored it, and met Demyx in line.  
"Where'd Roxas go?" he asked. I shrugged off the shiver and mumbled,  
"Someone called him and told him that he needed to come home right away so he just started walking home." Yeah, it was a lie, but what else could I tell him? "Bummer. Oh well, guess it's just the two of us again." He smiled as the line started inching forward. He blabbered about the band and when we finally got in (after flashing our fake ID's) I made a beeline for the bar. Demyx followed somewhat slower and shouted over the music,  
"Looking to get wasted again, Ax?" I just nodded, ordering a Screwdriver with a heavier amount of alcohol. I downed it in one gulp and asked for another. I took my usual stool and scanned the crowd. Usually there's at least one or two good looking girls here, but I was having a hard time finding one.  
"Looking for something?" the bartender asked, almost teasing. I turned to look at her. Not bad, I noted. She had black eyes and even darker, ebony hair paired with fair skin and a nice rack. She had a smirk on her face as she handed me the drink.  
"You new here?" I ask, avoiding the question. She rested her small face on her hands, her elbows against the glass tabletop.  
"Why yes, I am. Do you know every bartender at this place?"  
"Yup. I'm a usual customer, though I only come when they're hosting a good live band." I pause to down the drink she just handed me. I felt a little bit of a buzz coming on already. "And that doesn't happen more than three times a month. Always on the weekends." She laughed.  
"You know more about this place than I do! Ya want another?"  
"Sure, sweetcheeks. What can I call ya by?" She got the supplies and busied herself for a moment with the drink.  
"You can call me Xion. What's your name, firecrotch?" I chuckled.  
"I'm Axel. It's nice to meet ya."  
"The pleasure's all mine," she retorted. She poured out two more Screwdrivers and downed one herself. "So what bands are good in your opinion?"  
"Anything rock. I don't like the rap and hip-hop shit they have in here most of the time." I started on my next drink. She nodded and I decided- target acquired.  
"Good to know at least one of my customers has good music taste AND is hotter than a ghost pepper." My lips stretched into a wide grin. This one is gonna be easy.  
"Yeah, well it's good that they finally hired a sexy barmaid." I winked at her and finished my drink. "They've been in desperate need of one since I started coming here." She laughed, throwing her head back.  
"I'd take a bet that you mean that in more ways than one!" I laugh back and shrug.  
"Ya want me to lie or be honest?"  
"What you you think?" She says, getting up to get more drinks.  
"Alright. I've banged proly ten girls from here in the past year and you're hotter and make better drinks than any one of them."  
"Only ten?" she chuckles. "I'm surprised they don't line up for you."  
"They did, but I don't screw ugly sluts." Se plunked two more drinks on the counter.  
"Well, Axel. You can pay for these in one of two ways." I raised my eyebrows, daring a glance at her cleavage, which was hanging out of the tank top she was wearing.  
"The two ways are?"  
"You can either fork over a twenty or you can use that twenty to get a taxi to my place." I grinned even wider, if that was possible.  
"Just name the time and address, sexy. By the way, I've wanted to ask you something all night."  
"Oh yeah, and what's that?"  
"Do you have any Italian in you?"  
"Uh, no I don't think so," she said.  
"Well you're gonna tonight." I winked at her and she giggled.  
"Fuck this shift," she says, taking off her apron. "Hayner, cover for me!" she shouts. The blond on the other side of the bar nods. I look sideways at Demyx, but he's immersed in a conversation with Zexion, his college friend who works here. Xion pulls my attention back to her with a hard kiss on the lips.  
"Let's go, cutie, and find out if that red hair is actually natural."


	8. Conversations With Thyself

Chapter 8: Conversations With Thyself

_AN: I just wanted to thank everyone for the reviews and follows. C: It always motivates me to write more when I know someone out there is actually reading and liking what I put out on the interwebs~ You guys are awesome! 3_

Roxas' POV

I knew I couldn't sleep forever. Even as I cracked my eyes open in the sunlight, I knew something was wrong. I sat up in bed and whirled my head around. My eyes finally settled on Axel's chair of choice. As they rose higher, they grew wider and wider. I nearly screamed. It was like I was looking in a mirror.  
"Who the hell are you?" I hiss. "And where the fuck is Axel?" The blond yawned.  
"I thought you might recognize yourself, but I guess I overestimated our intelligence. Or, perhaps you already knew it but didn't want it to be true." He shrugged. "As for your redheaded friend, I assume he's with my Axel." My heart thundered in my chest.  
"Okay... well why did you two switch places?" He rolled his eyes.  
"Wow. You are so dense. I am part of you, he is part of Axel. You know what's going on in the back of your mind, so stop asking stupid questions. I only know what Axel knew and you know."  
"Tell me what Axel knew." He stood from the papasan.  
"I'm not sure I have to. I'm not sure that I even want to. I'm not sure you even want to know." He sat on the corner of my bed. "You don't want to know how twisted and gross he is." I gulped noisily.  
"I do. I want to know what he's putting Axel through."

**********************

Axel's POV

After kicking that black haired whore out of my house with false promises of calling, I took to the shower. I didn't notice the shivering figure in my closet until I was changing.  
"Whoa, what the fuck? Who's there?" I got a little closer and saw that the thing was rocking back and forth in the corner of my walk in closet.  
"C-can I go back?" a familiar sounding male begged.  
"Go back where? Who the hell are you?" I yanked the blanket off of the person and jumped back in shock. He looked at me with shell-shocked, blank, empty, green eyes.  
"I miss Roxas. Can I go back please?" He sounded like a child, begging for his favourite stuffed animal. He looked like me, but was obviously nothing like me. "I don't like listening to weird noises and whores." I blinked.  
"How long have you been here?"  
"Too long. Since I regained consciousness- around 11 pm." He started to sound less childish and more like a normal teenager.  
"What are you named?"  
"Axel, dumbass," his eyes filled with emotions and venom. "I don't appreciate you screwing a slut with my name, my body, and my voice."  
"This is my body, my name, my voice. I will do with them what I please. You are nothing more than a phantom, just like Roxas was. Why are you here instead of him? Does it have something to do with last night?" He shrugged at my questions.  
"Like I'd know. Maybe your phantom 'Roxas' would know, but I don't care to help assholes who put me through misery for a whole night and give me PTSD and ear AIDS." I rolled my eyes.  
"Whatever. I put Roxas through a lot more hell than you've ever dreamt of." He shivered at my statement.  
"I feel sorry for him. And I don't want to know. I just want to go back to my Roxas. If you don't let me go bacl, I'll try to go on my own."  
"Dude, I don't even know where he lives. Plus, you're being an ass and I don't want to help you."  
"I know where he lives and I can tell you as much as I know if you take me there in the next 5 minutes."  
"...Deal."

**********************

Roxas' POV (again c: )

I was staring, wide-eyed at the dull eyed blond. His accounting of rape, torture, and fear was almost too much.  
"That... that sounds nothing like my Axel. My Axel is sarcastic, sure, but he's nice, funny, and caring. Nothing like the monster you're describing."  
"Yeah, well look at who they were raised by. My Axel wasn't raised. His stupid dad is never home and he has no mother. You and your Axel were raised by Aerith, and your Axel was mostly around you. The difference between you and I is solid, and it will be interesting when the Soul Battle takes place."  
"Wait, what's a-" *knock, knock, knock*  
"Roxas? Are you awake, deary? You have a visitor," Aerith called through the door.  
"Yes, ma'am, I'm awake."  
"Good, I'll send him right in." She whispered back down the stairs and heavy footsteps replaced them. He didn't bother knocking, but just barged right in, arrogant as I'll get out. MY Axel stood behind him, however, and pounced on me like an excited puppy.

"Axel!" I called happily, smiling and hugging him tightly. The other redhead looked rather uncomfortable and mumbled something to the blond, who nodded and mumbled back at him.  
"I'm so happy to see you, Roxas! God, the things I endured with that slut fucking man." He shuddered, but remained smiling, hugging me tighter and tighter every second- he could touch me now, but not other objects. The other Axel cleared his throat.

"So, uh, did Roxas happen to tell you?" I glared at him.  
"About?"  
"The Soul Battle. Well, battle is too strong of a word. It's just a competition to determine who is the stronger half of the soul and deserves the right to a body."  
"Um, no. He told me nothing, though I believe he was about to tell me."  
"Well, the Soul Battle is a competition we can sign up for with the person who told me things about Roxas, here. His name is Yen Sid. He holds the competition and ensures an even playing field by creating temporary physical forms for our half-soul friends here. I'll tell you more about it on the way there."  
"We're going now?!" I nearly shout. He gave me a look that clearly said, "No shit sherlock."  
"Your buddy can't leave my side until he has his temporary form. I don't want him, I want Roxas back, and he wants you. We are going as soon as you get dressed. We'll be waiting in my truck." He walked out of the room a sad and worried Axel in tow. Roxas looked as dull as ever.

"Honestly, I hope I lose. Unfortunately, that would require my Axel to lose and he never loses," he mumbles. "All the same, best of luck to you. If you lose, you'll be the one without a body."

AN: And a twist! :D


	9. Souls' Conflict

Roxas' POV

We rode in silence out of town, all the way out to that creepy house that Sora and I were too scared to go near. I got more and more on edge. What exactly did this entail? I didn't want to lose Axel (my Axel, I don't care about the creepy asshole that looks like Axel) and I really didn't want to lose my body.  
Finally, after what seemed like hours, we came crawling to a stop outside of the house.  
"We're here," the driving redhead said. Axel had been rubbing circles on my hand during the drive, but I couldn't hear his thoughts and it left me feeling alone. I swallowed, following the blond out of the truck. The redhead walked confidently up to the door and rang the door bell.  
"How exactly do you know this guy again?" I mumble.  
"He's a family friend. I came to him when I was little and explained Roxas to him and he attempted to help me. He told me that Roxas would never fully exist until I found his other half." The front door swung open and a tall old man with a long beard stood in the doorway.  
"Yes? Oh, hello, Axel. What brings you here today?"  
"Hello, master. I found the other half." The old man nodded and looked over to me.  
"I see. Well, do come in. We will begin promptly. Have you explained to the bewildered boy what is going on?"  
"Partially, master. It's hard to explain it as well as you," the redhead replied. We all crossed the threshold and the door swung shut behind us. The old man turned around and began to address me.

"What we will be doing in the next several days is a process to determine who is more worthy of owning a body. The other set of half-souls will either disappear or be accepted by the other set. We will give your half-soul friends temporary bodies and the survival trial will begin."  
"Wait, survival trial?" I ask, trying to absorb as much as I could. He nodded.  
"Your friends and family will have their memories altered to believe you've been home in the following days. I will put you into a survival world. All you have to do is survive longer than the other pair. I will put each pair into separate but identical places in order to keep things fair and keep you from interfering with each other."  
"How long will it last?"  
"A maximum of 13 days, as determined by the number of generations your half-souls have skipped," he answered, unfazed by my questions.  
"And where are we going?"  
"I will show you after I put your half-souls into bodies."  
The old man turned around and strode down the hall, the rest of us following. He stopped in a hospital-like room.  
"Half-souls, lie down on the beds, please. The one that looks like Axel on the left, the one that is blond on the right." Axel and the blond obeyed and soon there were beeps coming out from the machines surrounding the beds. "These machines are capable of detecting half-souls and their properties." He pointed to a CAT scan looking machine. "This one will give them temporary physical form." The redhead and I nod. I stood next to Axel and rubbed his hand.  
"It'll be okay, buddy. We'll get through this together." Axel nodded and grinned at me.  
"Of course. This is me we're talking about." I smile but step back as the old man yanks the end of the bed toward the big machine and pressed some buttons. The machine made a loud whirring sound and the inside flashed lights around Axel. The top sealed off, blocking my vision of Axel.  
In less than a minute, the machine shut off and opened. The old guy pulled the bed back out, and Axel looked exactly the same, except he was opaque.

As he got off the bed, he stretched his arms and sighed in content. I ran over to him and slammed into his solid chest. I hugged him tightly and he hugged me back, his head resting on my shoulder.  
"This feels so strange..." he muttered. "Everyone can see me... I can touch everything and everyone..." he said, as he touched my face. "It's so strange..." He looked into my eyes. His eyes had emotions fluttering in them like thousands of butterflies. Confusion, happiness, fear, and many others flitted across the bright green.  
"It's okay, Axel. It's normal to feel weird. You've never-" He cut me off with a sudden kiss.

My eyes widened. Axel. Was. Kissing. Me. As sudden as his lips were there, they left.  
"Wha?" I stupidly mumbled.  
"I've always wanted to do that," he says, grinning. "Sorry, Roxy." Blush was slowly working its way up my entire face and across to my ears and neck. My first kiss lost to not only my best friend but a guy. What? My mind buzzed so loudly I couldn't even think for a moment. Axel hugged me tightly to his chest as the blond went into the machine.  
"Alright, children. You two will be red, Axel and his half-soul will be blue."  
The old man held out red bandanas and waited for us to take them. Axel jumped for his and was eager to touch the fabric. He rubbed it all over his face, grinning wider than the Cheshire cat and tied it around his upper arm just as the blond got out of the machine. He looked solid but still dull. His redhead swept him off the bed and snatched the bandanas. He left the room with the blond dangling in his arms, uncaring. Axel rolled his eyes.  
"That guy is a sick fucker. He's probably just gonna abuse that kid's body." I gulped, feeling sorry for the boy.  
"Axel! We have no time for your shenanigans! We must start immediately!" the old man shouted. "And for your information, my name is NOT old man. I am Old Man Yen Sid. Yen Sid for short."  
"Yes sir," Axel and I blurted.  
"Good. I'll send you both first." Yen Sid sighed. He waved his hand over a glass orb and the top split into two sides of a cover, sliding down the edges of the orb. They revealed two smaller orbs. They rose out of their places inside the orb and began to change in colour. They turned green and yellow and blue. "These are the miniature worlds I will put you in. You two will be on the left one. Are you ready?" We nodded, despite our confusion. There's no way that was possible. However, as soon as he waved his hand over us, I realized that it was happening and it was real. I shut my eyes at a sudden tug at my stomach and opened them when it left. I was somewhere completely different but still holding Axel's hand.

"Where the hell are we?" Axel asked to no one in particular. I shrugged and dropped his hand.  
"Wherever we are, we have to survive it and longer than that asshole and his poor half-soul," I replied. Axel nodded.  
"Agreed. I'll start a fire and you try to find things to build a tent out of, okay?" I agreed and trudged into the forest to look for something. Hell if I know what, though.


	10. I know nothing about survival

_AN: Thanks for reviewing 'n' shtuff guys~ C: I loves chu~! During the survival period, I'll refer to main Roxy and imaginary Axel as the Red Team and real Axel and his imaginary Roxas as the Blue Team! :D Now that we have that sorted out, this goes out to the fellow soul who will soon be busy with exams. I feel your pain!_

Chapter 10: I Know Nothing About Survival.

**Red Team:** Roxas' POV

Right. What can I use to make a tent? I wandered through the tropical forest in search of something, anything, to make shelter out of. Palm leaves and sticks? I could use some strips of green bark as rope... but I don't have a knife. A sharp rock? Could I tie long pieces of tall grass together to form a rope? I plucked two blades of long grass and tested out the possibility. No, they'll slip apart because they're waxy. Hmmm... I could use strips of cloth from my shirt... I pulled my shirt over my head and tried to ignore the whistle I heard from Axel, not fifty feet away.  
"Lookin' good, Roxy!" he teased.  
"Keep making that fire, asshole!" I shouted back.  
"Well it looks like I just lit one under your ass!" I chuckled at his sense of humour. I had ripped my shirt into shreds during the brief conversation and began to tie enormous palm leaves together, some as big as my torso. I heard large snaps to my right and looked to find Axel snapping huge branches off a tree.  
"Those won't burn. They're wet," I told him.  
"I already have a fire going. I'm going to put them close enough to start drying them out. Besides, we'll need some of them to make a tent," he replied while he snapped of another branch. "Ouch! Dammit!" he swore, recoiling and holding his hand. I dropped the leaves and clamored over the bushes to him. I took his right hand away from his chest and almost laughed.  
"Congats, Axel. You just experienced your first boo-boo." I smirked at the tiny scratch. It wasn't even bleeding. I knew it must feel painful to him though because he'd never built up a pain tolerance. His eyebrows were pinched together and instead of taking back his hand, he laced his fingers with mine.

"Roxas... It's so weird being... physical. There's so many things I've never felt before... And I don't know how to explain the one I'm feeling." I looked him in the eyes. Confusion reigned in the emerald orbs.  
"Try to. I'll help you with everything you're feeling, okay?"  
"Well..." he started. "I feel pain. But not like my hand. It's dull and it's not in my hand. It's here," he said, bringing our entwined hands to his chest, right over his heart. "And I'm warm. But not because of the humidity. And when I look at you... I really start to feel weird." I tried to hold back any blush that was trying to make its way onto my face, but it was hard.  
"How so?" I ask in a low voice.  
"I... I want to be closer to you every time I look at you. It's like magnets. Except I get warmer... But not all over or anything, just-" he cut himself off with a deep blush. Axel blushing. Wow. I never thought I'd see the day. "I think... I think I'm really attracted to you or something." Damn. I had been trying to forget about that kiss and write it off as a friendly gesture, but it looked like it was not so. My face turned hot. "Can I... kiss you again?" he asked, so sweetly and innocently it was like he was a child. I don't say anything, but just nod slightly, going a shade darker of pink.

He took his left hand and cradled the back of my head there, slowly bringing his face towards mine. It felt like it took forever, but his lips met mine. It felt like an electric shock, and I'm sure he felt it too because he jumped back for a second. Only for a second though, before he kissed me again. I felt light headed and I couldn't think. All I knew was that Axel was kissing me and it was... Electrifying. He kissed me over and over, experimenting with little pecks and longer kisses, lingering on my lips. I lost track of the number, and didn't register anything until somehow I ended up on the ground, his shirt knotted in my fists, and he laid on top of me. He looked at me, wide eyed, and I just looked back at him. It took a moment, but he seemed to realize what happened and blushed.  
"I- I'm sorry, Roxas, I don't know how that happened. I'm sorry." He got to his feet hastily and offered me a hand. I slowly took it, trying to collect myself. "I'll, uh, keep getting firewood and some branches for the shelter, okay?" I nodded and he left. I heard several snaps before I finally shook myself out of my daze and went back to the leaves I'd abandoned.

**Blue Team:** Roxas' POV

Axel told me to sit and look pretty while he set up camp. I'm pretty sure he just wanted to wack it in privacy. Oh, he planned on violating me later, but we'd need some form of shelter before that. I sat on a log in a small clearing and just stared at the sky. Nothing really matters. Not Axel, not me, not winning this stupid thing. I hope I die before Axel gets back. After all, I'm pretty good bait for a bear or something. Are any animals here? Any dangerous ones? Maybe Axel would be eaten and this whole mess could be done. I don't care if I never have a permanent body, I don't care if I disappear. I don't care about much at all. I sighed once more before the rustling came from the opposite side of the clearing.

Axel was back with wood, tinder, and huge leaves. He ordered me to use the logs and leaves to make a tent. "Make it snappy," he said. "I want to fuck you while you have a temporary body. That way, when you have a permanent body, none of the marks I make now will show up. It's like a blank canvas." I begged any god out there to smite this asshole with lightning, but no such luck. I took as long as I could with the tent. Axel got pissed with the slow progress and promised a worse punishment. What is this, a male dominatrix and an unwilling victim? The only problem is that he could make more than this aspect of my life hell.

Before we met the other set of half-souls, Axel would put lewd, disturbing thoughts in my head that should never be thought by anyone. He knew a 'spell' that would make me semi-physical for an hour, and in that hour, he would unleash all the sins of the earth onto me. Needless to say, it was awful. I shudder to think what it will feel like now.

Axel wasn't always sick. He was nice when he was little. The last time I remember him being nice to me and not using me as his little rape toy was when he was eleven. That was when his mother left. His father was out of town and his mom's boyfriend (the one she'd been cheating on his father with) raped him. He became devoid of any love and I melted and corroded into what I am today: empty.

Axel laid more palm leaves on the ground underneath the little canopy I'd begrudgingly made, and yanked me hard by the wrist on top of them. I let my eyes droop. Who cares? I can't fix this and no one cares about a boy they cannot see, so why cry anymore? Why care anymore? Why...  
"What the **fuck**." I hear him state. "You're crying? Roxas. You haven't cried in years. What is wrong with you?" I open my eyes and lift my hands to my eyes. Sure enough, I was crying.  
"What is wrong with _me_? You. You are what's wrong with me. You killed the inside that doesn't exist in me, Axel, and you were supposed to _fix_ the nothingness, not replace it with pain." I felt angry. Axel slapped me across the face- hard.  
"Don't speak to me like that. How could I ever fix you when I have nothing inside either? You don't understand. You never have." He began to crumple and pull away from me. "You're the only one who used to make me feel whole again. Now you have as much love in your heart as I do."  
"I don't have a heart, Axel. Hearts are for the living," I reply.  
"Well right now you do! Why don't you just use it for once!" he shouted. He curled up into a ball and started to cry. It reminded me... of that night... His father wouldn't even look at him and told him it was his fault. Blamed him for his mom leaving. I remember how badly I wanted to hurt him. I used to be like my flesh twin, so why couldn't I try to be loving for the piece of Axel that still cared?

I touched Axel lightly on the shoulder. He looked up at me angrily. I wiped away his tears gently and pulled him to stand. I held him close, even made the move to kiss him. I kissed him softly, and he responded softly in turn. He hugged me gently and began to unfold his shell like a tiny blooming flower. He loved me gently, so unlike him, and made the night a gentle one.

_AN: OMG real Axel has a heart?! O-O_


	11. Set the World on Fire

Chapter 11: Set the World on Fire

Red Team: Axel POV

What the hell was that? I thought to myself. I angrily (more embarrassed than anything else, really) broke several branches. I kicked the tree closest to me (As if it was the f*cking tree's fault, Axel. Smart.) and resisted the urge to shout out my growing anger. What the hell is wrong with me? And what the fuck was that?! I don't even know what the hell I was doing! I glared at my weird body. You're supposed to be "attracted" to girls. Whatever attractive even feels like. I sat on a stump and sighed. I let my head fall into my hands as I thought about what I'd done.  
_*Axel Vision*_  
_ Roxas held my throbbing hand gently and I felt shivers run up my spine. Pain was very unpleasant if it meant getting shivers too. However, I'm beginning to think it's not pain that's sending pulses of electricity through me. I laced my fingers with Roxas' experimentally. I shivered slightly and a new pain awoke in my chest. It hurt, but not like the cut. I looked into Roxas' eyes._  
_"Roxas... It's so weird being... physical. There's so many things I've never felt before... And I don't know how to explain the one I'm feeling." He blinked at my words but smiled encouragingly._  
_"Try to. I'll help you with everything you're feeling, okay?" _  
_I sighed, but tried to explain it to the best of my abilities._  
_"Well... I feel pain. But not like my hand. It's dull and it's not in my hand. It's here," I said, bringing our hands to my chest, right over my heart. "And I'm warm. But not because of the humidity. And when I look at you... I really start to feel weird." I started to flush bright red. Every reaction I was experiencing happened for reasons I didn't know, including my face turning tomato red._  
_"How so?" Roxas asked. I nearly groaned. I didn't know how to explain the rest well, but I gave it my best go._  
_"I... I want to be closer to you every time I look at you. It's like magnets. Except I get warmer... But not all over or anything, just-" I blushed darker. I couldn't finish that sentence. It was weird. I was warm in a really awkward place and I didn't know... anything. But what I said was true- I felt a need to be close to Roxas. Maybe it was because I was praying that we could win this competition? Maybe it was because I was afraid we wouldn't?_  
_"I think... I think I'm really attracted to you or something." That much was as true as I knew. "Can I... kiss you again?" I blushed even darker until he nodded, a light pink spreading across Roxas' face. I laced my left hand through his soft hair until my fingertips rested on the back of his head, at his scalp. I brought his just a little closer, enough for our lips to just brush lightly. I felt a jolt of lightning strike through me, and be jumped a little apart. The shock made me warmer, but in a good way. I brought him back to me and kissed him again. That's when I lost track of what I was doing. I vaguely remember Roxas' tiny fingers pulling on my shirt and his sigh of contentment. Until somehow we ended up on the ground, flush against each other. We stared at each other in shock until I suddenly bolted up, embarrassed._

What was that? And why did I react like that? Why did I feel like that? And what the fuck is with this fucking heat? I chucked my shirt into a bush, but it barely helped. My chest wasn't what was hot.  
I need to ask Roxas some questions about what I'm feeling. It's gonna be embarrassing, but I have to suck it up and be a man. A man, Axel. Be a man. I groaned. "I dun wanna!" Suck it up, man. I sighed and picked my shirt up. God, this is gonna be a nightmare.

**Red Team: Roxas' POV**

I was still blushing, hot, and trying to make shelter when Axel came stumbling through the bushes, words already forming at his lips.  
"I'm really sorry for whatever I did that made me react like that, but I need you to answer ome questions for me." I blushed a little, but sat on a log and gestured for him to do the same.  
"Okay, shoot, buddy," I said, feigning casual. Axel was having a harder time with it. I felt a shot of dread. Dear lord, I bet it's-  
"Am I sick?" I furrowed my eyebrows at that.  
"Why do you think you're sick, Axel?"  
"Well I'm really warm, like I have a fever and my stomach is doing backflips. My heart is beating really fast and I... hurt," he tried to explain.  
"Where do you hurt?" I asked. Surely he couldn't be sick, he'd had a body less than six hours. Then he pointed to the place I was worried he would. I blushed dark red. "D-don't worry, you're not sick, Ax."  
"Then what's wrong with me?" he asked innocently.  
"Umm... think about the ugliest person you've ever seen."  
"Like Mrs. Rey? Good God, that woman was disgusting. But why would I think about her?"  
"Just do it, okay? Remember that one time our eyes were violated at the pool when she wore a bikini three sizes too small?" I said. He grimaced.  
"Her fat was hanging out everywhere, how could I forget that? That scarred me for life." We both laughed at that.  
"Feel better yet?" I asked. His eyebrows knitted together.  
"Yeah, a little bit. Why did thinking about that nasty woman help though?" I guess this speech is unavoidable, especially if he keeps a body... It sucks that I have to be the one to explain this awkward topic to him though.

"Well, Axel, when you, um, kiss someone a lot or other stuff, you get turned on." I'm sure my face was already darker red than Axel's hair.  
"What does that mean?"  
"You know that feeling that you were having?"  
"That was being turned on? Why does that happen? I... like kissing, but not that feeling. It hurt."  
"Umm... well, it's so uh, people can reproduce..."  
"That doesn't make any sense!" he argued. I sighed, getting frustrated.  
"Axel. You were getting turned on. Getting turned on makes 'down there' hard so you can have sex with a girl and get her pregnant."  
"But I don't want to get a girl pregnant."  
"Oh. My. God." Axel was just not understanding. "Okay, come here," I ordered. He stood up, and I surprised him with a rough kiss. His eyes popped wide in shock. I wound one of my arms around his neck, the other around his waist, pulling him closer. He started responding clumsily to my kisses and automatically put his hands on my hips. I moved my lips to his neck and kissed him there.  
"What are you-" he started, but didn't continue when I bit his neck. He stifled whatever was going to come out of his mouth and bit his lip. I kissed the mark and sucked on a patch of skin behind his ear. Axel moaned. I was surprised when he pushed me away, breathing heavily.  
"What the hell are you doing to me Roxas?" His cheeks were flushed, and sure enough, he was turned on. Very, by the strain on his jeans. I blushed a little and tried to stammer out an explanation. Axel groaned and grabbed me, kissing me again. "Whatever you're doing, either explain it to me or show it to me," he whispered huskily in my ear.  
"Umm.. I, uh, I think I should try to explain now," I stuttered. Oh boy. Wow, this'll be fun...


End file.
